Its been awhile!

Life has just been "Go, Go, Go!" Lately. I have been blessed with another nanny job. I watch 5-year-old twin boys in Cotati. Their mom is a single mom, San Rafael Police Officer (she commutes)
Mon-Wed I have to wake up at 4AM, put my stuff in the car, turn it on to warm it up and then go get precious sleeping Hailie and buckle her in. By 4:15 we are off to work. We get to sleep in a spare bedroom, so that's awesome. By 7:15 I am up again, getting the boys up and ready for kindergarten. Since the boys are in school, I work a split shift. I'm off until its time to go pick them up! Their mom works a 14 hr day, 3 days/week so that she can be with them as much as possible. Sometimes she'll sign up for overtime and we both get an extra day of work. And sometimes she gets subpoenaed for court cases and there's another extra day of work. So its good, steady, reliable work for me and its awesome! My husband Daniel and I both have good reliable jobs and have finally been able to be saving alot of money. Awesome blessing!
Its funny, my work days have become my "relax" days and my weekends are the days I get tired out! I love it though. Work hard, play harder! We were just saying, a few weeks ago on a Saturday at the river that that's how we want it. You only get one life, one shot. Gotta seize every day! Make differences in people's lives. Spend time with family. I'm gonna make it a goal for everyday, do at least 1 nice thing for at least 1 person.

So there's a life update. As for fitness, I've been maintaining my weight alright. I've pretty well recovered from my strained tendon in my knee, though it occasionally gives me trouble still, like if I'm really tired and my running form is poor. I ran the Santa Rosa Marathon and the Healdsburg Half since I last wrote. My times were 4:26:05.780 for the marathon (that was 22nd place for my division). I was 2 weeks off my tendon and was thrilled just to finish my first full marathon. Tears filled my eyes once I came to the finish, which I totally did not expect. My muscles felt like they were pulling off from my bones. Definitely not a Boston qualifying time, but I did it.

As for the Healdsburg half, I came in 6th place for my division with a time of 1:53:58 which winds up being an 8:41/min/mile average. That was 6th place for my division (out of 22.) I was dissapointed. I took it too slow in the beginning. Some of my splits were 10min/miles! I could have easily held a 8:30 for the first 6 miles, then a 7:30 or raster for the rest. But Rebecca and I had alot of fun. We REALLY enjoyed the course!! It was one of the most beautiful races I have ever ran. I think the Half Marathon is my favorite race distance. I like 10k's alot too though, so its hard to say.
A few days ago, I was 130 lbs. Still 5 pounds under last year's christmas eve goal, but up 7 pounds from 4th of July. I want to blame my injury because it stopped me from running, but I know there's no excuse. Its time to crack the whip again. My mom and I did 5 miles this morning at an 8:32 average (that included a little warmup walking... alot of the time we were under 8min/miles.)
I want to do nice runs like that maybe 3 or 4 times a week (or more, if I can) and I want to do alooot more weight training. I know that will really up my speed. And if I stop eating too much. Its just hard cause that means gym which equals more time that I'm gone cause I have to drive there and back. Which sucks for my babysitters. Part of me is reluctant to commit to that goal. Its frustrating but fitness is alot of time and work. See, here I am with all these excuses. Thats what has got me to gain 7 pounds in a few months. It may not seem like alot to some, but I'm scared to try on my skinny jeans right now. I just started a new round of dietbets, so that should help my motivation. Its hard to have a job and a child and still reach fitness goals but I know it is possible. I know it as well as anyone can. Here we go... ok guys, I'm gonna commit again to my ultimate weight loss goal again. by Christmas eve *2014* I will weigh 115 pounds (still 7 pounds above minimum "healthy" weight for my height, so no freakouts!). It will be pure muscle on my 5'3" frame. I'll take pics later today so I can do progress pics again. I'll need to lose about 1.6 pounds of fat per week. That's EASY in my book!!! I can still have fun on the weekends - without over endulging. I don't need a mimosa in order to be having a good time. Here I go again!!

Oh, and I wrote this at my 1 year mark but never wound up posting it. Here's a bonus blog entry:  :)

"Its been one year today, July 26th, 2014 since I started my journey! I started out at 172 lbs and met my goal with two weeks to spare, of weighing 135lbs by Christmas Eve 2013. I have since surpassed that goal and my new lowest weight is 123 lbs! I have been counting calories, making sure the calories I eat are from healthy, balanced, nutritious sources. I have also been running as most of you know. I have taken it above and beyond my greatest expectations! I have placed 1st and 2nd (in my age group) in two 10k races this year, placed 2nd in a half marathon, August 10th I will be running my second half marathon and then on the 24th, I will run my first full marathon. Hoping to finish in under 3:30 (about 8 minute miles) in order to qualify for the Boston Marathon. I will be thrilled just to finish but it would be really cool to be able to run Boston. My current favorite distance is a 10k (6.2 miles), but to conquer the marathon once or twice will be awesome :)
I need to drop about another 10 pounds so I can be fast enough in my next races. I'm not stressed about it at all though.

I have been thoroughly enjoying my first summer being fit! I'm no longer stressed out about going to the beach or what i'll wear or how my legs will look in shorts or anything! There is so much freedom!! I now realize why gluttony is a sin (lots to say on that subject). You eat a ton, you feel rotten, very likely will treat others rotten, hold yourself back out of shame or embarrassement, and the world misses out on YOU. You don't know what giving 110% of yourself is, until you are literally physically able to do it!
Put the fork down when you have had enough and you will feel much better and you will start to shine! That being said, I eat pizza still. I have birthday cake. I'm not a perfect health freak but i'm all for little treats in moderation. Unless its after a 14 mile run and you desperately need that slice of mint chocolate chip cake that your mom made for your sister's birthday... it was worth it! ;)

I have definitely noticed I instantly want to eat when I am stressed or sad or hurt or just bored. I have had to retrain myself to go do something productive when I want to eat, but am not really hungry. Usually that means cleaning something.

I have definitely had my share of stress and heartache this year. Life has been life. But you know what? That's NO excuse to give up. Life hasn't gotten easier, but it has been easier to handle it all, now that I'm in shape. Its weird how health and fitness permeates into most every aspect of your life. But it does and when i'm depressed, at least now I can't add "and I look like a fat cow!!!" To my list of woes. Energy is endless. Confidence is up. I can think clearer. Shopping is FUN again!! (I'm still all about thrift stores!) Its so exciting to see something super cute, know your size (I'm a size *0-2* now in pants... used to be like a 16!!! Mind=blown) and know you won't look fat in it. For someone who was obese, this is HUGE. I haven't forgotten what it was like. Walking across a parking lot paranoid about the lumps sticking out. Seeing a crush and wishing you weren't hideous. (Well, I wasn't... I was and am and always will be God's princess but "hideous is how I thought of myself).
What you eat in private, you will wear in public. I have learned SO much this past year. I might have stretch marks and my lower stomach is still a little squishy but I'll sport my bikini anyway because I have worked too darn hard not to!
Oh... and I did this without a gym membership. No special pills, teas, program, dvd's... I laced up some running shoes, ventured out into the neighborhoods and trails around me, SWEATED, didn't eat away all my progress, and got healthy. I even have big cavities in my teeth that are healing and repairing now! (I'm not kidding... its possible... google it!)

So here's to one year of losing even more than my previous lofty goal. Maintaining my weight, finding a new zest for life, new hobbies and interests, being closer to God than ever, being the mom and wife I wanted to be, no excuses, taking control of my life, going all out and running the race to win!!"

Back In The Saddle

I've been doing better with eating after last week's mess ups which, combined with my lack of running, landed me in 130lbs-land. After the half marathon race, I was beyond drained and tired. Didn't eat enough post-workout food for recovery. And NOT have the energy to run at all. Body was screaming "take a breaaaak!!" So I did. Last Wednesday was my first real run. I did 4 miles at a 7:30 min/mile pace, which I was pretty pleased with. I've been taking 65mg of iron daily since the race. I don't think I was eating enough of it even though myfitnesspal said I was. I read that endurance runners need alot more and last time I tried to give blood, I came up as anemic so I wasn't able to donate. So iron pills it is! And I really think its helping alot. That 4 mile run felt effortless at that pace, where before my legs would be burning and feel really tight. It may also be because I had over a week of rest but I've done that in the past and didn't feel as great coming back.

Sunday (yesterday) my mom and I decided last minute to do a 10k race in Sonoma called "Hit The Road Jack". She took first in class and I got 2nd! We had alot of fun and I beat my human race time! I put up 51:26 with an 8:17 pace. The first half was hard, my legs burned and felt heavy (not much sleep the last few nights may have been a contributing factor) but once I took my "2nd surge" Accel Gel I took off. I reallyyyy want to be able to do a 10k in 45 minutes or less. That is my goal. I'm sure if I had a better start in that race I could have made that goal. First half of the race I was doing between 9:30 and 8:48 min/miles. Sloooowwww for me, for a race.

I will probably be doing the Kenwood Footrace on the morning of July 4th, so maybe THEN I will meet my goal!! I'm starting to expect to place now in races ha... realizing I am more than capable. It would be REALLYYYY cool to take first place of all the women. THAT would be sooo cool!
Oh! And June 14th i'm doing a fun 5k relay race at Riverfront Regional Park in Windsor with my friend Danneca Skandera so that will be suuuuper fun!! Lots to look forward to!!

I forgot to weigh myself over the weekend. My pants are looser again though, so I know I'm losing but i'll just wait till Saturday to weigh in. Welp, until next time!

First Half Marathon Race: Complete!

Wow guys... this race tested every ounce of me. At mile 11 I didnt know if I could finish without walking. I pushed as hard as I could and the official results are in:

TIME: 1:53:12.83
PACE: 8:38/mile
AGE PLACE (20-24 yr old females): 2ND!!!
PLACE OVERALL: 142!!!

The first place girl for my age group's time was 1:49/something. So about 4 minutes faster and 1st place could have been mine! I'm more than thrilled to take home 2nd, especially since this was another TOTALLY UNEXPECTED WIN! I just gave it my all the whole way and I guess it was good enough! I had a rough start, was in line for the bathroom and barely made it to the start as the gun went off. Then my phone couldnt get a gps signal for the first 5 minutes so I was trying to keep up with my cousins as I waited for the signal cause of course I want to track a run like this for calories burned etc!
Finally got a signal, got my belt on and around mile 2 ate a banana. Right before the start, I drank 4 oz water with preworkout in it. And I ran with 3 energy gel shots (Accel Gel) in my running belt, plus a water bottle. Finally around mile 3 I got a good speed going and started passing people. At mile 7 I ate an energy gel. I drank sips of water throughout the race. Oh this morning I ate oatmeal and 12oz pure coconut water. I pushed past people as the miles flew by. Its really weird and I almost feel guilty passing men. Its that same old "don't want to offend anyone/make them feel awkward" thing I always have going on in my head. I passed them strong though of course :)

By mile 11 I was just hitting a wall so bad. Legs felt like lead, but I pushed through it and got my *fourth* wind lol. The course had hills throughout so I was REALLY REALLY glad that I trained on Petaluma Hill Road, which lives up to its name. Doesn't seem like much when you drive but when you are running it... you feel it alot!!!

The last half mile I was neck and neck with this other girl. It was a race between us for the finish. We cane around that last turn and I got the inside. I could hear her gasping and I gave it every last ounce of strength I had and sprinted for that finish line!! I finished 0.23 seconds ahead of her! I dont think she was in my age group so I doubt it effected my place but she was FAST, TALL and had rippling muscles all over her legs... it was definitely a challenge!!!
They handed me a finisher medal, a cup of gatorade and a protein bar and I went to go cheer on other runners and wait for my cousins. Finally about 45 minutes I found out I placed second :) I got a bottle of wine in a wooden box with a little plaque that says my place and everything. (Pics below hehe)
Crazy beautiful day for a race, STUNNING COURSE and God carried us through, injury-free :) fantastic race day! My next Half is August 10th and my goal will be to beat 1:45:00 and hopefully catch a first place. Training starts tomorrow! (Or tuesday if I'm still too gassed out :)).

Ok, here's our before and after the race pics, official time posting and other fun stuff :) 

First 10k race under my belt!

Well guys, I did it!

Ran my first 10k race and i can't flipping believe it, but I got first place for my age group and 46th place overall! out of over 8000 people! My time was 50:18.5 so that puts my pace at 8:11 per mile! Which I'm pretty surprised about cause I haven't been working on my speed lately. Its a great win but still, in my head there were 45 other people who trained harder than I did, who ate better and slept better. Not sure what the #1 time was, I'll have to look online. This is crazy, I was FLOORED when I found out! Couldn't believe it, had to do a few double takes. I almost didnt even register as a timed runner either!! Only decided to do that yesterday! I did NOT think even for a second that I had a shot at even the top 10 in my age group!

 This is right after I found out I got first place :)

my goal for my next 10k (no idea when that will be, haha) is gonna be to beat 45 minutes.

 

I'll be working on speed for the rest of this week until Friday (at which point I will rest until the race), in preparation for our half marathon on Sunday May 18th. 

Crazy to think only 9 months ago, I was obese and couldn't even run a mile! Now I just got first place in a 6.2 mile race?! Its nuts!

I haven't been doing well with my eating. I keep eating wayyyy too much at "second dinnertime" (I really only need one dinner) and I've jumped back up to 129 pounds just within 2 weeks. 2 saturdays ago, I was 125.6. Granted, some of that is water weight but man. If I had been on track, I'm sure I would have beaten my 50 minute goal and who knows, maybe could have made the top 25 overall in the race.

Welp, that's my race results! I'll write next week after the half marathon!

Long Time, No Write... I Know.

Jeez I haven't written in a month or more. Life has been absolutely crazy. I started working full time on the 31st of March. I have kept up running and my eating is usually on track... for the first part of the day... lol. By dinner, I don't know what it is, but I keep eating way too much. Like everyday. My theory is that now that I'm working and being a lot more physically active, I need a lot more calories vs. when I was just at home everyday. So I think I need to just bite the bullet and raise my calories. Maybe then I'd actually start losing again. I havent been gaining but I havent been losing either. Last I checked I was 126.4. But that wasn't first thing in the morning so I don't know. Thank GOD I haven't gained. I'm really shocked about that... I seriously eat like over 2000 calories a day lately and am not gaining weight.
As you may recall from previous posts, I had a goal to be 120 by my mom's birthday. I definitely wasn't 120. So that sucks pretty bad. I am trying to figure out where my commitment went. I mean what the heck man, I was doing so well for so long! I don't know how I did it! How did I say "no" to all the cravings and stuff?
Its really interesting and I think there's something psychological to it. I keep letting myself "cheat". And have been craving sweets like crazy! Mainly chocolate or ice cream or anything with peanut butter.

So besides my eating being off track, at least my running is going strong! Later today my cousin Rebecca and I are gonna run 9 miles. That will be a new personal Record for my distance! I am registered for the Windsor Half-Marathon on May 18th. Gonna run the Human Race (10k) on May 10th and then another Half-Marathon on August 10th before the Santa Rosa Marathon on the 24th of August. Call me crazy but then in October I'm planning to run a 3rd Half. The three of them are a series where if you finish all 3 you get a custom label bottle of wine from I-forget-which-winery. Hahaha. I'm not a huge wine person but I like it alright and a custom bottle sounds pretty cool :)

Soooooooo anyways that's pretty much it lately. I need to recommit to my goals. Ok so here it is... by July 1st, I will be 115 pounds *or* have a 6-pack. Whichever comes first. That's 2 and a half months to lose like 12 pounds. SO do-able!

March Madness! (I know, I'm corny)

Well here we are. The third month of the year is almost halfway over!
I haven't had the best week calorie-wise. Went out for drinks with the girls on sunday night and had a few nights where I ate too much. Not TOO bad... only a few hundred over goal... I gotta have fun SOME times!

And I had some good long distance runs this week and ran Petaluma Hill Road again. I also did pushups yesterday... 3 sets of 8 "girl" pushups (haha). I am soooooore! Quads and armpits. Which I read being really sore can mean your muscles are swollen and therefore retaining water... which would explain why the scale said 126.6 today. No matter. I'm in the frickin 120's on a "fat" day. No complaints here!!

Ugh I seriously need to do abs! What's my problem!? Ok I'm just gonna do some today. I've been super busy but that's no excuse! If I can find time to run, I can find 5 minutes to do some abs!
Here's why I need to do 'em! My un-worked-out abs are starting to show through my blubbery stomach finally!!

So yeah, I'm VERY stoked! NOTE: these pants rock cause they hide my saggy, stretch marked lower belly. Where abs are still invisible. But that doesn't stop me from being stoked about the progress I'm seeing! See, if I would just frickin buckle down and work 'em! 

Oh yeah, so I think it was Monday of this week, I did 7 miles again on Petaluma Hill Road... guess what, they were 8:11 minute miles!! That's almost my 5K speed!!! What the heck! I don't know how it happened. Sometimes you just have a day where it all just "clicks" and you float through your run and magically PR. I got a lot of sleep the night before. Maybe that had something to do with it. 

Oh yeah, I gotta tell you guys about this amazing pre-workout powder!! (I wasn't using it for that 7 mile run... but if I had they probably would have been 7 minute miles haha)

But yeah, the stuff is called C4 oh my gosh, you will PR if you use it! Costco has the best deal! $38.99 for TWO tubs! I paid $36 at GNC for ONE. What the heck. The only downside is Costco only has the fruit punch flavor and GNC has tons of flavors (LIKE WATERMELON OMG NOM). I'm not kidding though, this stuff is incredible. You have SO MUCH ENERGY. Its super powerful. If you aren't already working out when it kicks in, you get this bad "pins and needles" feeling all over your body. The more sedentary you are, the more it hurts. So yeah, just a little tip for you. Drink it and get moving asap!! I'm not gonna use it every workout. For races, yes, and maybe every now and then when I'm adding mileage. Cause I don't want to feel like I "always need it" and stuff. But if you want a good pre-workout drink, "C4 Extreme" is the stuff, I tell ya!

Anywaaayyys, enough plugging products. Hope you are all having a fantastic week! I'm gonna go eat some old fashioned oatmeal with 1/4 cup of whole milk in it with a dash of cinnamon, as my breakfast. Have a great week, all!

Praise Report!

Most of you probably know this, but my husband Daniel, Hailie and I live with Daniel's mom. We rent a room from her. It has been tough financially, and we need to move out, for obvious reasons. I long for my own home! My own kitchen to clean, my own yard/garden to tend, a room and bed that i can tuck my daughter into... etc. It has been hard relying on just one income. I am currently in the process of getting what is called a Small Family Home Childcare License, which allows me to care for up to 6 children (or 8 if at least 2 are endrolled in Kindergarten+) at home. Doing so will bring in a lot of money and allow me to be with Hailie. But we need our own place in order for me to start. That is the hold up.

I don't know how some Moms do it... leave their kids at daycare and go to work. I can't do it. I just physically cannot. I would rather live under a bridge in a cardboard box. But that's just me haha!

Anyways, so I have been looking for a way to earn money while still being able to stay with Hailie. I am selling plants, cleaning homes, and make a little money using some fitness apps I have but obviously that isn't enough to move out on.
I was getting to the point where I felt so powerless to my situation. I felt unstable, insecure, and I was going out of my mind with some of the issues involved with our living situation. Why I waited so long to cry out to God, I do not know. But when I finally did, he has answered!

About a month ago, I had this measly $5 bill floating around my wallet. I knew it was there and I was kind of hoarding it, not wanting to spend it until I REALLY needed it. One day, I was just letting my mind wander and an old daily Bible Devotional came to mind from 5th grade probably, that my mom had taught/talked about. It was all about tithing and the Lord's promises involved with tithing. I thought about the story Jesus told about the lady who gave her last gold coin to the church and how that was sweeter and more valuable to God than the lady who was rich and had given more than a gold coin. (This was probably from a little kiddie bible, so forgive me if my facts aren't straight... but you get the point!)
Then I thought about my little $5 bill. That was it. I needed to stop worrying about it all. I also thought about Matthew 6:26:

"Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?"

And there are many scriptures about how God loves us and wants what is best for us. How he wants to give us the desires of our heart.
Psalm 37:4 comes to mind:

"Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart."

Simple and to the point. That Sunday, with a humble and happy heart, I gave my last $5. I put it in the gold bowl/plate at church and basically forgot about it. I was in substantial credit card debt from having to pay bills with them, broke, but at peace. That night I went on care.com (you may have heard of it) and applied to (literally) 43 Nanny jobs in the area. I also put out a request on facebook for work anyone was willing to give me, as long as Hailie could be with me.
As I drifted off to sleep, I laid there with my eyes closed and left it up to the Lord. In my heart, I said: "God, if this is a good idea... if this is something in your will, something that can get me out of here, please help me to succeed. Please find the perfect family. The perfect kids for me to watch and care for. In your son Jesus' name... amen"

The next few days I received few replies. Most said they filled their positions, some (almost rudely) expressed their opposition to my bringing Hailie. "That's ok." I thought. If God wants it to happen, he would make it happen.

After a series of events, Daniel and I now need to move out by July 1st.

The first few days after this news broke, I tried to put on a happy face and "stay strong"... whatever that means... eventually I was freaking out inside. There was no money coming in.

I thought about all my hopes and dreams. They seemed so far away... so untouchable. Would I ever own a house in the country with 50 acres to live off of? Grow my own food organically and sustainably? Raise livestock, raise my babies where they can run barefoot in the soil and find all the simple joys of planting a seed and watching it grow? Seeing the new life of a chickie begin as it hatches, or watch puppies being born, or bunnies, or anything? Where i can teach them the things my parents taught me. That there is more to life than material objects and all the acheivements of man. Teach them to value the Kingdom of God. To love deeply. To trust. To have faith. To be humble. Teach them that it is not with flesh and bone that we wrestle with. That there is an unseen spiritual world. And so much more that I don't know how I can ever be as good of a parent as they are.
Would I ever have my own Jersey milk cow? My own horse? Have a little farmstand and sell some things for money to buy what I can't grow or make myself?

I just broke down inside my heart. I want more than what I have! I need it! And I know God wants it for me. "I am more than what I have become".
I cried out to him again a few days ago. "God, don't you see me?! I know it is by my own actions that I am in this situation. I know I turned away from you, and that path lead here but please Lord, please... I want to come back! I need your help though! I can't do it alone! I want to live the life you planned for me! I want the gifts that you want to give me. I want YOU God! Please hear me and save me from this place!"

Fast forward to now. We received our income tax return and it was enough to get us out of debt.
And I had several friends message me on facebook about work, which has helped! (Especially helped my moral)

Then yesterday happened. I got an email from a lady from care.com. I remember her job opportunity had stood out to me because it seemed PERFECT. Full time, consistent schedule, kids were the right age (and CUTE to boot!) And it paid well. I left it to God though and kept applying to more.
The lady with the perfect job had emailed me. Her name is Jessica and she had just had 3 potential care-givers fall through. I emailed her back and she said I sound like the perfect match! I got the job you guys :) I will be paid a flat rate per day, and paid (1/2 time) bank holidays, vacation time, sick days and that bonus week between Christmas day and New Year's. I will be making enough that in a few months, I will have enough saved to move out on! (Yes I subtracted my current bills). I know I took a long time to write all of this, but I really wanted to give thanks and glory to God for providing the perfect job for me. The family actually lives very close to my parents too, so I will probably get to go visit sometimes if I get off early and what not :)

So next time you feel helpless, alone, unloved... like your life is out of control, you feel like your situation is impossible. Feel like you've dug yourself into too deep of a hole... He can still pull you out! He is there in the struggle! He will help you! I am no one special! I have sinned as much as the worst of us. God is faithful to you. He loves you and He will keep His promises!

This job will get us out of here. Get us in our own home. Then I will have my Childcare license and do in home daycare. I have my "10 year plan" for saving and eventually buying my own land with a home on it, debt-free. I know there will probably be hiccups in the journey there, but I am trusting God :)

200 days and counting!

Yesterday was my 200th day in my streak on MyFitnessPal. That means 200 days since my weightloss/healthy journey began. It doesn't feel like its been that long! As I've said before... I'm glad I started when I did. I didn't wait for "monday". Didn't wait till "the first of the month", or even "first of the year". I just started. What I was currently eating was what was maintaining my obesity/helping me gain more. As hard as it may be for some people to accept, your weight is in your complete control. No one else's. No one is holding a gun to your head, telling you to keep eating. Telling you to eat another cupcake or piece of chicken or slice of pizza or whatever your drug of choice is. I say drug because researchers are now finding that eating certain foods for most people triggers a dopamine release in the brain the same as a drug addict's when they get their fix. It may not be as strong as say, heroine or cocaine, but it is the same thing that happens. You sink your teeth into that pizza or bloomin' onion or doughnut and your brain says "YESSSS!" obviously, that rush soon subsides and the brain wants it again. We are wired biologically to be pleasure seakers. The Good Lord put this in us because it helps us servive in the natural world he first created us in. But nowadays... there are calories galore... too many... and when that gets combined with low nutrition per calorie, you have someone who is literally starving from a nutritional standpoint but yet they are quite noticeably overweight or obese. You've got to eat nutritious foods. Sure, treats are fun now and then. Like Sunday... I ate fried Calamari and Fish n Chips! (Probably why I only lost 0.4 pounds this week haha) but it was a fun treat, I enjoyed it and am done with it. That's the first time in months I have eaten anything deep fried. I don't do it everyday or I will blow back up to my obese self. 

So yeah. Not to lecture, but that stuff has been on my mind lately.

Anywaaayyysss things have been going aight. Like I said, cheat meal happened on Sunday evening. And I went a little over my calories on friday and saturday so today my weight is 127.2. I'm totally happy with that. I have been sick now with a bad cold for over a week. Despite that, I still have the energy to train for our half marathon. The mileage has been low (5 miles was my biggest run this week) but at least I'm getting out there! Never before would I have been able to comfortably run 5 miles with a sinus infection!! I guarantee you, it is because of what I have been eating. I eat to fuel my body now. Not to please my tongue. (Ok, sometimes I please my tongue...).

I think that's pretty much it for this week. Thanks for reading :)

Transformation pic I forgot to post here!:

The winds are a'changin!

What's that, self? Run a 10k, half marathon and full marathon by the end of August this year? Sounds like a plan!

Its on like Donkey Kong! Saturday May 10th 8am: Human Race (Santa Rosa) 10k! That's $35.

Then Sunday May 18th, 8am (my brother Benjamin's bday!) The Windsor Town Green Half Marathon ($75). We are beginning half Marathon training this week!
Once we have completed the full, we will begin full marathon training for:
August 24th 6am, the Santa Rosa Marathon ($125) I'll use mainly my dietbet winnings to pay for everything and no doubt I'll need new trainers too but if anyone wants to donate money towards races I won't say no! ;) haha no but seriously. Haha. Its gonna be like $400 this summer in races and shoes. Of course, you don't need to do races to be in shape. But its something really cool that I feel passionate about and I really want to do it!

I'll be running these races with my cousins Rebecca and Gabriella Elliott (Gabrie will be in Germany for the full though, so obvs she can't run it), my cousin Janae too and then my sister Julia is on board too I believe! I'm seeing if my sister Bella wants to run. Its gonna be so fun! We have to come up with a team name and we're gonna make shirts and everything! Fitness and health are contagious! I'm soooo excited! We are crazy but we're gonna do it!

I'm back on track with weight loss too! 127.6 pounds this morning! On track for diet bets and everything!

I killed my abs last week and did squats and deadlifts. Just need to keep it all up! This is the first summer of my teenage and adult life that I will be in shape! I am soooo looking forward to it!

The weather has been absolutely fantastic the past few days! I know we need more rain here in California but I'm getting spring fever already!

My heart is happy, my body healthy and my spirit is content and at peace today. God is good! In His will, may these plans succeed!

Whoosh!

Last Sunday (Superbowl) I pigged out to the max. I seriously ate so much food. Chips, dip, nuts, celery dipped in blue cheese dressing, strawberry/banana skewers, homemade jalapeño poppers (baked instead of deep fried, but still...) and probably like 20 hot wings and honey bbq wings. Oh and 2 Shock Top beers. I was so full, it hurt. I weighed in monday morning 5 pounds heavier than the previous Friday. So I dropped my calories back down to 1220 and got back on track. I know a lot of that was just my body bloating and retaining water from all the sodium I consumed, (my fingers were noticeably swollen by bedtime) but I have another dietbet round ending on the 21st and I need to be 128 for that. 

Well I took a peek on the scale yesterday and hadn't lost much weight. So all day yesterday I drank tons of water! (109 ounces... no joke) It helped my cravings and then this morning I got on the scale and put up 129.8!!!!!! I can't believe it!!! I'm in the 120's!!!! And the fabled "whoosh" is real! Haha. So yeah that is some crazy stuff!! Hard work is paying off!! The scale seriously said that! 

My cousin Rebecca and I finished our distance training yesterday! Today we did a shorter run with my other cousin Gabriella (Rebecca's sister) but tomorrow we plan to begin our crazy intense speed training. Yay! Its supposed to be 5 days/week but I doubt we will be able to train that much. We'll try though! We have 12 weeks till the race. Just enough time to complete the program if we stay on track. So we might not complete it but every little bit will help our time. week one starts us out just running 4 miles but we have to really push our speed. So that's totally do-able.

Wow I'm in the 120's... sorry I just remembered! Haha

I went shopping a few days ago at the thrift store my sister Julia works at (one of the Crossing The Jordan stores. The boutique-y one in Rohnert Park) and got a whole bunch of new (to me) clothes! Its still a strange cool feeling to go right to the "small" section to shop. I can pick out cute things and know they won't "make me look fat". Among the things I bought was a pair of jeans size 3. They are still about 2 sizes too small. I can barely button them. But they are my new "goal" jeans! They are actually the right length too haha. Jeans have almost always been too long on me for as long as I can remember.

There they are! Can't wait till they fit! 

So that's this week's update! Hope your day goes well and all! 

Get yo head in the game!

Well, as of today I am the same weight as I was the last time I wrote, two weeks ago. This morning I was 131.2. Which is a good weight, I'm not complaining by any means, but I've just been maintaining my weight lately and I feel like I need to recommit to my goals. I keep having "cheat days" which turn into "cheat weekends". It isn't even bad food. Just more food than I should be having in order to continue towards my fitness goals. Especially when I go to my parent's. I just want to join in the fun there and enjoy myself! But. Time to buckle down again. by the end of February I want to put up a 126. That's about a 5 pound loss for February. Easily achievable.

Training has been going well. Rebecca and I are right on track! On Tuesday, she didn't have time to run so I just ran alone. Decided to try to do a fast 5K and see how my speed was. I thought I wouldn't do very well since we've been training for distance so much lately but I put up a brand new PR! Sub-25 minutes with a 24:46! Over a minute faster than my previous best. I don't know how it happened. I just went HARD the whole time. Sprinted the last 0.10 miles. And it just happened. I think this next week is our last week of distance training and then we will begin our speed training.

I officially won two more Diet Bets as of today! They are still finalizing other player's numbers so I won't know how much money I have won until another day and a half but I expect it to be around $100. So that is pretty cool :)
and I signed up for a few more to keep my motivation going and to kick February into higher gear! I figure I can pay for the new ones with my current winnings and then once I win the new ones, THAT money can go for my Human Race entrance fee and whatever else.

My husband Daniel has been doing amazing still! he had a cheat day last Sunday and still managed to put up an incredible loss this week! He's losing more than what most people recommend, but he started out at a higher weight and so its different than if someone like me was to be putting up numbers like that. Once again, he's going to be posting a blog which I will share on my facebook, so I don't want to give away his stats... But it has been a month so he is posting some non-scale victories and they are shocking!

Sunday is Superbowl Sunday. We are going to my sister-in-law's new place for a party. We'll be bringing hot wings, bbq wings, and some healthy appetizers and deserts. That will keep me on track. I may have a beer or two, we'll see what my calories allow for, haha. I will probably let myself go over a little, since I'm only at the beginning of the month and diet bets, but I'm not going to pig out a ton and eat too much. I will be avoiding potato chips and dip, as that is one of my food weaknesses and once I have one, I just can't seem to stop. So that is my battle plan.
Valentine's day is coming up soon too. I plan to just have a few of whatever sweets I get. Just a little treat or two. Won't let myself pig out. I need to focus on myself again. Get my head in the game!
Since I've only lost another 5 pounds since my last progress pictures I'm still not posting any new ones. Maybe by the end of this month there will be a noticeable change if I drop another 5 pounds.

I really really need to stop procrastinating weight training. I am a cardio gal. Heck, I have lost over 40 pounds with cardio! But I seriously need to do some squats, deadlifts, work my arms and my core. I need to just buckle down, lift the heavy weights, and get stronger. my arms are too skinny. They need some meat on them. (actual meat, not more fat...)

I have been feeling guilty lately for being this thin. I had a few comments from a couple people (who are overweight themselves) that I need to make sure I "don't go too far" and "You will not look good if you lose more weight. It will just be gross. 120 is WAAAYYY too thin for you!" (Nevermind the fact that it is a PERFECTLY NORMAL weight for someone of my height. that would only be like a 22(ish) on a BMI scale. I would have to weigh less than 108 for it to be considered underweight. and I don't think its possible to weigh that little and still maintain the muscles I have. Seriously. I will never get THAT skinny.
But yeah, after those comments I have been feeling bad and self-conscious and afraid to lose more weight kinda. That's one reason why I didn't post a blog last week. I guess I'm just afraid of people thinking I'm getting too thin. But I seriously am not! Maybe I should post more pics so you can see I still have a very flabby stomach. I know that's a lot of pregnancy loose skin but trust me, there is plenty of fat in there still. And I want a version of a 6-pack by summer so, ya know. Gotta cut the fat and grow the muscles. 120 is just a goal. its more about what I look like now than what the scale says. It is just a number I'm shooting for, but the real finish line will be that stomach definition. You know what, I'll do it. I'll show you guys my stomach when I DON'T suck it in:

Yeah, there... you see? Def not too skinny. Its very squishy and jiggly and flabby. Not anything compared to what it used to be, but I look 15 weeks pregnant if I don't suck it in! Again, not complaining. I guess I'm just trying to justify my goals? So there! Haha well that's all for now. Thanks for reading!

Oh wait! I almost forgot to show you guys this picture! I must have been 13/14 in it and I am obviously woofing down nachos. This was in my very chubby days. My sister Julia found it and sent it to me a couple days ago:

Ugh, SO embarrassing! The ultimate "fatty" picture! Ok bye for reals now :)

Greener grass

Everyday I keep going. Everyday I'm doing this. It has become a lifestyle for me... keeping track of what I eat, seeking out healthier versions of my old favorite foods, running a heck of a lot. I think, sleep and breathe it now. I LOVE the new body I have and what it is capable of. I can run and bounce around, playing kangaroo with Hailie, I feel so free!! I used to look down and I felt trapped with all this fat stuck to me. I was in Petaluma last Sunday for my birthday (24 now, woop woop!), walking down E. Washington street and realized I wasn't trying to tuck my muffin top into my pants. I wasn't subconscously paranoid about a bulge sticking out somewhere. Didn't have to try to suck it in for pictures. I was just free. Holding hands with Hailie as we walked around the seed bank there. So free. And it is wonderful! I wasn't wearing baggy clothes either!

This morning I weighed in at 131.2. So that's better. I think that's a 2 pound loss... the max of what I want to be losing every week. But I should probably still eat more calories.
My cousin Rebecca and I are getting better at running! We did a run this morning (6.33 miles out past Cotati over some hills out in the country... BREATHTAKING.) and our average miles were almost exactly at 9 minutes/mile. Which is suddenly a huge jump in speed and I don't know how or why. You'd think the hills would have killed us, but we kicked butt! Got a great calorie burn in!

My husband Daniel started losing weight too, just a couple weeks ago and I can already see a difference! I won't give away his stats because he has a blog too that he will probably post later and I don't want to steal his thunder but he is doing FANTASTIC. He will blow you away with his progress! He is so driven and commited! He seems stronger in all this than I was! Especially when I first started. He is so inspiring, be on the lookout for his post soon! I'll put a link in my facebook when he posts his!

So other than that stuff, my legs have gotten some crazy definition going on! I have skinny ankles and big feet so it looks like I have frog legs but check it!:

Oh, and excuse the messy room!

Day 152

Well I hopped on the scale this morning and it said 133.6! So I lost like 3 or 4 punds this week which is more than I should be losing. So I'm upping my calories to 1600/day. But I  am now sub-previous goal!
I assume its from the 10k training... massive calorie burn.

Speaking of the training, its going very well! My trusty running buddy and cousin, Rebecca and I are up to running about 5 miles now (with our short walks every 2000 yards, as prescribed by our program). That doesnt include warm up/cool down distances. We are almost finished with week 2. Just need to run tomorrow. 10k is the equivalent of 6.2 miles, so we have a little ways to go before we're putting up that number. 4 more weeks to be exact. Then its on to speed training! Its way more fun to run with a friend than to run alone. To me anyway.

It has been easier to eat clean now with my husband on board doing the same thing as I am. No more junk food temptations in the house haha.
So I just wanted to give a little update. My stomach has noticeably gotten flatter. Here's my measurements:

Last time (12/13)           Today:

Arm: 10.5"                      Arm: 10"

Waist: 29.5"                   Waist: 29"

Hips: 34.5"                     Hips: 34.5"

Thigh: 22"                      Thigh: 21"

Calf: 14.25"                    Calf: 14"

So I have definitely lost inches everywhere but my hips! Fine by me! I feel so free! Its fun :)

So yeah that about wraps it up for today.

Here's some motivation:   :)

Update

I feel good starting the new year off like this. I just ran 5 days in a row! Still working off those holiday treats. I forgot to weigh in this morning before i chugged 24oz of water but when I did, I was 136.4. So I have definitely lost weight again.

My cousin Rebecca recently moved back home from North Carolina and we have been running a lot. She lived there for almost a year with her brother's family while he was deployed (he's a marine).
So she's back now and we are running buddies! We are training for a 10k race in May! (The Human Race.)

I finished my 5k improver app program this week and so we both started a 5 to 10k program yesterday! My calorie burn is already doubled and we aren't even running full 10k's yet!
So I'll be taking a break from working on my speed for 6 weeks of 10k training. Then we will start a 5days/week grueling 10k speed improvement program, hopefully finishing just before the race!
So yeah lots of cool exciting things on the horizon! I'm thinking of doing a few more diet bets to pay for it. Its only $35 but hey, if I can win my entry fee, that would be great :)

Other than that, everything has been pretty good. I've been staying on track with my eating. Been working in the garden a little. Doing some prep for spring. I get sprung fever too early every year. But I'm planning where everything will go, picking out seeds, turning soil etc.