A week and a half in

Well as of last weekend I was 135.6! And this morning I took a sneak peek at the scale and I was down to 133.6, so that freakin rocks! 13.6 pounds until goal! Which means I only need to lose 1.43 pounds per week now. Awesome news!

I forgot to take my tape-measure measurements. Gotta do that soon. Cause I can see improvements in my thighs and hips.
I know a big reason I dropped weight, even with a hectic weekend where I ate a little too much, is that I did alot of lifting on Saturday. I did a ton of ab work, did my pushup sets, did arms, shoulders and legs. Normally I wouldn't train that many body parts in one workout, but it was my only day that week that I could workout. So I had to kill it!

Monday morning I had the stomach flu. Normally I'd attribute some weight loss to that, but I made sure and ate about 1000 really healthy extra calories that day. By Tuesday morning, I knocked out a 4 mile run with Hailie in the stroller, between work shifts. My quads burned so so bad. My hamstrings and glutes were still really sore from Saturday's squats and deadlifts. So it was a kinda crappy run, speed-wise. Today I did 7.5 miles at a 9:47 min/mile pace with the stroller, which is really good for stroller pace! Its usually just a goal of mine to be under 10 minutes per mile haha. Some of my splits were under 8:30 min/miles! So that was inspiring! I felt great today. Alot of energy. This was my pre-run breakfast smoothie (about 350 calories):

8oz organic coconut water (normally I like to use Almond Milk - original unsweetened, but I opted for the potassium-rich coconut water. That, and it has been in the fridge for awhile and I wanted it gone haha) to that, I added:

1 banana

4 strawberries

8 blackberries

4 ice cubes

1 scoop MP Combat Cookies 'n Cream protein powder
And about 1.5 cups of organic baby spinach

Blended that up real goooood and it served me well on my run! Perfect fuel for a run.

So there we go, that's my weekly update! Good progress, good results, feeling great! Its like I almost forgot how easy it honestly is to lose weight. Eat really healthy foods (doesn't cost an arm and a leg... honestly), watch your portions, and workout like crazy! I even did an in-home workout last week because it was raining and I couldn't run or go to the gym. It isn't brain surgery. Its all totally do-able. Good stuff!

Its been awhile!

Life has just been "Go, Go, Go!" Lately. I have been blessed with another nanny job. I watch 5-year-old twin boys in Cotati. Their mom is a single mom, San Rafael Police Officer (she commutes)
Mon-Wed I have to wake up at 4AM, put my stuff in the car, turn it on to warm it up and then go get precious sleeping Hailie and buckle her in. By 4:15 we are off to work. We get to sleep in a spare bedroom, so that's awesome. By 7:15 I am up again, getting the boys up and ready for kindergarten. Since the boys are in school, I work a split shift. I'm off until its time to go pick them up! Their mom works a 14 hr day, 3 days/week so that she can be with them as much as possible. Sometimes she'll sign up for overtime and we both get an extra day of work. And sometimes she gets subpoenaed for court cases and there's another extra day of work. So its good, steady, reliable work for me and its awesome! My husband Daniel and I both have good reliable jobs and have finally been able to be saving alot of money. Awesome blessing!
Its funny, my work days have become my "relax" days and my weekends are the days I get tired out! I love it though. Work hard, play harder! We were just saying, a few weeks ago on a Saturday at the river that that's how we want it. You only get one life, one shot. Gotta seize every day! Make differences in people's lives. Spend time with family. I'm gonna make it a goal for everyday, do at least 1 nice thing for at least 1 person.

So there's a life update. As for fitness, I've been maintaining my weight alright. I've pretty well recovered from my strained tendon in my knee, though it occasionally gives me trouble still, like if I'm really tired and my running form is poor. I ran the Santa Rosa Marathon and the Healdsburg Half since I last wrote. My times were 4:26:05.780 for the marathon (that was 22nd place for my division). I was 2 weeks off my tendon and was thrilled just to finish my first full marathon. Tears filled my eyes once I came to the finish, which I totally did not expect. My muscles felt like they were pulling off from my bones. Definitely not a Boston qualifying time, but I did it.

As for the Healdsburg half, I came in 6th place for my division with a time of 1:53:58 which winds up being an 8:41/min/mile average. That was 6th place for my division (out of 22.) I was dissapointed. I took it too slow in the beginning. Some of my splits were 10min/miles! I could have easily held a 8:30 for the first 6 miles, then a 7:30 or raster for the rest. But Rebecca and I had alot of fun. We REALLY enjoyed the course!! It was one of the most beautiful races I have ever ran. I think the Half Marathon is my favorite race distance. I like 10k's alot too though, so its hard to say.
A few days ago, I was 130 lbs. Still 5 pounds under last year's christmas eve goal, but up 7 pounds from 4th of July. I want to blame my injury because it stopped me from running, but I know there's no excuse. Its time to crack the whip again. My mom and I did 5 miles this morning at an 8:32 average (that included a little warmup walking... alot of the time we were under 8min/miles.)
I want to do nice runs like that maybe 3 or 4 times a week (or more, if I can) and I want to do alooot more weight training. I know that will really up my speed. And if I stop eating too much. Its just hard cause that means gym which equals more time that I'm gone cause I have to drive there and back. Which sucks for my babysitters. Part of me is reluctant to commit to that goal. Its frustrating but fitness is alot of time and work. See, here I am with all these excuses. Thats what has got me to gain 7 pounds in a few months. It may not seem like alot to some, but I'm scared to try on my skinny jeans right now. I just started a new round of dietbets, so that should help my motivation. Its hard to have a job and a child and still reach fitness goals but I know it is possible. I know it as well as anyone can. Here we go... ok guys, I'm gonna commit again to my ultimate weight loss goal again. by Christmas eve *2014* I will weigh 115 pounds (still 7 pounds above minimum "healthy" weight for my height, so no freakouts!). It will be pure muscle on my 5'3" frame. I'll take pics later today so I can do progress pics again. I'll need to lose about 1.6 pounds of fat per week. That's EASY in my book!!! I can still have fun on the weekends - without over endulging. I don't need a mimosa in order to be having a good time. Here I go again!!

Oh, and I wrote this at my 1 year mark but never wound up posting it. Here's a bonus blog entry:  :)

"Its been one year today, July 26th, 2014 since I started my journey! I started out at 172 lbs and met my goal with two weeks to spare, of weighing 135lbs by Christmas Eve 2013. I have since surpassed that goal and my new lowest weight is 123 lbs! I have been counting calories, making sure the calories I eat are from healthy, balanced, nutritious sources. I have also been running as most of you know. I have taken it above and beyond my greatest expectations! I have placed 1st and 2nd (in my age group) in two 10k races this year, placed 2nd in a half marathon, August 10th I will be running my second half marathon and then on the 24th, I will run my first full marathon. Hoping to finish in under 3:30 (about 8 minute miles) in order to qualify for the Boston Marathon. I will be thrilled just to finish but it would be really cool to be able to run Boston. My current favorite distance is a 10k (6.2 miles), but to conquer the marathon once or twice will be awesome :)
I need to drop about another 10 pounds so I can be fast enough in my next races. I'm not stressed about it at all though.

I have been thoroughly enjoying my first summer being fit! I'm no longer stressed out about going to the beach or what i'll wear or how my legs will look in shorts or anything! There is so much freedom!! I now realize why gluttony is a sin (lots to say on that subject). You eat a ton, you feel rotten, very likely will treat others rotten, hold yourself back out of shame or embarrassement, and the world misses out on YOU. You don't know what giving 110% of yourself is, until you are literally physically able to do it!
Put the fork down when you have had enough and you will feel much better and you will start to shine! That being said, I eat pizza still. I have birthday cake. I'm not a perfect health freak but i'm all for little treats in moderation. Unless its after a 14 mile run and you desperately need that slice of mint chocolate chip cake that your mom made for your sister's birthday... it was worth it! ;)

I have definitely noticed I instantly want to eat when I am stressed or sad or hurt or just bored. I have had to retrain myself to go do something productive when I want to eat, but am not really hungry. Usually that means cleaning something.

I have definitely had my share of stress and heartache this year. Life has been life. But you know what? That's NO excuse to give up. Life hasn't gotten easier, but it has been easier to handle it all, now that I'm in shape. Its weird how health and fitness permeates into most every aspect of your life. But it does and when i'm depressed, at least now I can't add "and I look like a fat cow!!!" To my list of woes. Energy is endless. Confidence is up. I can think clearer. Shopping is FUN again!! (I'm still all about thrift stores!) Its so exciting to see something super cute, know your size (I'm a size *0-2* now in pants... used to be like a 16!!! Mind=blown) and know you won't look fat in it. For someone who was obese, this is HUGE. I haven't forgotten what it was like. Walking across a parking lot paranoid about the lumps sticking out. Seeing a crush and wishing you weren't hideous. (Well, I wasn't... I was and am and always will be God's princess but "hideous is how I thought of myself).
What you eat in private, you will wear in public. I have learned SO much this past year. I might have stretch marks and my lower stomach is still a little squishy but I'll sport my bikini anyway because I have worked too darn hard not to!
Oh... and I did this without a gym membership. No special pills, teas, program, dvd's... I laced up some running shoes, ventured out into the neighborhoods and trails around me, SWEATED, didn't eat away all my progress, and got healthy. I even have big cavities in my teeth that are healing and repairing now! (I'm not kidding... its possible... google it!)

So here's to one year of losing even more than my previous lofty goal. Maintaining my weight, finding a new zest for life, new hobbies and interests, being closer to God than ever, being the mom and wife I wanted to be, no excuses, taking control of my life, going all out and running the race to win!!"

First Half Marathon Race: Complete!

Wow guys... this race tested every ounce of me. At mile 11 I didnt know if I could finish without walking. I pushed as hard as I could and the official results are in:

TIME: 1:53:12.83
PACE: 8:38/mile
AGE PLACE (20-24 yr old females): 2ND!!!
PLACE OVERALL: 142!!!

The first place girl for my age group's time was 1:49/something. So about 4 minutes faster and 1st place could have been mine! I'm more than thrilled to take home 2nd, especially since this was another TOTALLY UNEXPECTED WIN! I just gave it my all the whole way and I guess it was good enough! I had a rough start, was in line for the bathroom and barely made it to the start as the gun went off. Then my phone couldnt get a gps signal for the first 5 minutes so I was trying to keep up with my cousins as I waited for the signal cause of course I want to track a run like this for calories burned etc!
Finally got a signal, got my belt on and around mile 2 ate a banana. Right before the start, I drank 4 oz water with preworkout in it. And I ran with 3 energy gel shots (Accel Gel) in my running belt, plus a water bottle. Finally around mile 3 I got a good speed going and started passing people. At mile 7 I ate an energy gel. I drank sips of water throughout the race. Oh this morning I ate oatmeal and 12oz pure coconut water. I pushed past people as the miles flew by. Its really weird and I almost feel guilty passing men. Its that same old "don't want to offend anyone/make them feel awkward" thing I always have going on in my head. I passed them strong though of course :)

By mile 11 I was just hitting a wall so bad. Legs felt like lead, but I pushed through it and got my *fourth* wind lol. The course had hills throughout so I was REALLY REALLY glad that I trained on Petaluma Hill Road, which lives up to its name. Doesn't seem like much when you drive but when you are running it... you feel it alot!!!

The last half mile I was neck and neck with this other girl. It was a race between us for the finish. We cane around that last turn and I got the inside. I could hear her gasping and I gave it every last ounce of strength I had and sprinted for that finish line!! I finished 0.23 seconds ahead of her! I dont think she was in my age group so I doubt it effected my place but she was FAST, TALL and had rippling muscles all over her legs... it was definitely a challenge!!!
They handed me a finisher medal, a cup of gatorade and a protein bar and I went to go cheer on other runners and wait for my cousins. Finally about 45 minutes I found out I placed second :) I got a bottle of wine in a wooden box with a little plaque that says my place and everything. (Pics below hehe)
Crazy beautiful day for a race, STUNNING COURSE and God carried us through, injury-free :) fantastic race day! My next Half is August 10th and my goal will be to beat 1:45:00 and hopefully catch a first place. Training starts tomorrow! (Or tuesday if I'm still too gassed out :)).

Ok, here's our before and after the race pics, official time posting and other fun stuff :) 

First 10k race under my belt!

Well guys, I did it!

Ran my first 10k race and i can't flipping believe it, but I got first place for my age group and 46th place overall! out of over 8000 people! My time was 50:18.5 so that puts my pace at 8:11 per mile! Which I'm pretty surprised about cause I haven't been working on my speed lately. Its a great win but still, in my head there were 45 other people who trained harder than I did, who ate better and slept better. Not sure what the #1 time was, I'll have to look online. This is crazy, I was FLOORED when I found out! Couldn't believe it, had to do a few double takes. I almost didnt even register as a timed runner either!! Only decided to do that yesterday! I did NOT think even for a second that I had a shot at even the top 10 in my age group!

 This is right after I found out I got first place :)

my goal for my next 10k (no idea when that will be, haha) is gonna be to beat 45 minutes.

 

I'll be working on speed for the rest of this week until Friday (at which point I will rest until the race), in preparation for our half marathon on Sunday May 18th. 

Crazy to think only 9 months ago, I was obese and couldn't even run a mile! Now I just got first place in a 6.2 mile race?! Its nuts!

I haven't been doing well with my eating. I keep eating wayyyy too much at "second dinnertime" (I really only need one dinner) and I've jumped back up to 129 pounds just within 2 weeks. 2 saturdays ago, I was 125.6. Granted, some of that is water weight but man. If I had been on track, I'm sure I would have beaten my 50 minute goal and who knows, maybe could have made the top 25 overall in the race.

Welp, that's my race results! I'll write next week after the half marathon!

Get yo head in the game!

Well, as of today I am the same weight as I was the last time I wrote, two weeks ago. This morning I was 131.2. Which is a good weight, I'm not complaining by any means, but I've just been maintaining my weight lately and I feel like I need to recommit to my goals. I keep having "cheat days" which turn into "cheat weekends". It isn't even bad food. Just more food than I should be having in order to continue towards my fitness goals. Especially when I go to my parent's. I just want to join in the fun there and enjoy myself! But. Time to buckle down again. by the end of February I want to put up a 126. That's about a 5 pound loss for February. Easily achievable.

Training has been going well. Rebecca and I are right on track! On Tuesday, she didn't have time to run so I just ran alone. Decided to try to do a fast 5K and see how my speed was. I thought I wouldn't do very well since we've been training for distance so much lately but I put up a brand new PR! Sub-25 minutes with a 24:46! Over a minute faster than my previous best. I don't know how it happened. I just went HARD the whole time. Sprinted the last 0.10 miles. And it just happened. I think this next week is our last week of distance training and then we will begin our speed training.

I officially won two more Diet Bets as of today! They are still finalizing other player's numbers so I won't know how much money I have won until another day and a half but I expect it to be around $100. So that is pretty cool :)
and I signed up for a few more to keep my motivation going and to kick February into higher gear! I figure I can pay for the new ones with my current winnings and then once I win the new ones, THAT money can go for my Human Race entrance fee and whatever else.

My husband Daniel has been doing amazing still! he had a cheat day last Sunday and still managed to put up an incredible loss this week! He's losing more than what most people recommend, but he started out at a higher weight and so its different than if someone like me was to be putting up numbers like that. Once again, he's going to be posting a blog which I will share on my facebook, so I don't want to give away his stats... But it has been a month so he is posting some non-scale victories and they are shocking!

Sunday is Superbowl Sunday. We are going to my sister-in-law's new place for a party. We'll be bringing hot wings, bbq wings, and some healthy appetizers and deserts. That will keep me on track. I may have a beer or two, we'll see what my calories allow for, haha. I will probably let myself go over a little, since I'm only at the beginning of the month and diet bets, but I'm not going to pig out a ton and eat too much. I will be avoiding potato chips and dip, as that is one of my food weaknesses and once I have one, I just can't seem to stop. So that is my battle plan.
Valentine's day is coming up soon too. I plan to just have a few of whatever sweets I get. Just a little treat or two. Won't let myself pig out. I need to focus on myself again. Get my head in the game!
Since I've only lost another 5 pounds since my last progress pictures I'm still not posting any new ones. Maybe by the end of this month there will be a noticeable change if I drop another 5 pounds.

I really really need to stop procrastinating weight training. I am a cardio gal. Heck, I have lost over 40 pounds with cardio! But I seriously need to do some squats, deadlifts, work my arms and my core. I need to just buckle down, lift the heavy weights, and get stronger. my arms are too skinny. They need some meat on them. (actual meat, not more fat...)

I have been feeling guilty lately for being this thin. I had a few comments from a couple people (who are overweight themselves) that I need to make sure I "don't go too far" and "You will not look good if you lose more weight. It will just be gross. 120 is WAAAYYY too thin for you!" (Nevermind the fact that it is a PERFECTLY NORMAL weight for someone of my height. that would only be like a 22(ish) on a BMI scale. I would have to weigh less than 108 for it to be considered underweight. and I don't think its possible to weigh that little and still maintain the muscles I have. Seriously. I will never get THAT skinny.
But yeah, after those comments I have been feeling bad and self-conscious and afraid to lose more weight kinda. That's one reason why I didn't post a blog last week. I guess I'm just afraid of people thinking I'm getting too thin. But I seriously am not! Maybe I should post more pics so you can see I still have a very flabby stomach. I know that's a lot of pregnancy loose skin but trust me, there is plenty of fat in there still. And I want a version of a 6-pack by summer so, ya know. Gotta cut the fat and grow the muscles. 120 is just a goal. its more about what I look like now than what the scale says. It is just a number I'm shooting for, but the real finish line will be that stomach definition. You know what, I'll do it. I'll show you guys my stomach when I DON'T suck it in:

Yeah, there... you see? Def not too skinny. Its very squishy and jiggly and flabby. Not anything compared to what it used to be, but I look 15 weeks pregnant if I don't suck it in! Again, not complaining. I guess I'm just trying to justify my goals? So there! Haha well that's all for now. Thanks for reading!

Oh wait! I almost forgot to show you guys this picture! I must have been 13/14 in it and I am obviously woofing down nachos. This was in my very chubby days. My sister Julia found it and sent it to me a couple days ago:

Ugh, SO embarrassing! The ultimate "fatty" picture! Ok bye for reals now :)

Greener grass

Everyday I keep going. Everyday I'm doing this. It has become a lifestyle for me... keeping track of what I eat, seeking out healthier versions of my old favorite foods, running a heck of a lot. I think, sleep and breathe it now. I LOVE the new body I have and what it is capable of. I can run and bounce around, playing kangaroo with Hailie, I feel so free!! I used to look down and I felt trapped with all this fat stuck to me. I was in Petaluma last Sunday for my birthday (24 now, woop woop!), walking down E. Washington street and realized I wasn't trying to tuck my muffin top into my pants. I wasn't subconscously paranoid about a bulge sticking out somewhere. Didn't have to try to suck it in for pictures. I was just free. Holding hands with Hailie as we walked around the seed bank there. So free. And it is wonderful! I wasn't wearing baggy clothes either!

This morning I weighed in at 131.2. So that's better. I think that's a 2 pound loss... the max of what I want to be losing every week. But I should probably still eat more calories.
My cousin Rebecca and I are getting better at running! We did a run this morning (6.33 miles out past Cotati over some hills out in the country... BREATHTAKING.) and our average miles were almost exactly at 9 minutes/mile. Which is suddenly a huge jump in speed and I don't know how or why. You'd think the hills would have killed us, but we kicked butt! Got a great calorie burn in!

My husband Daniel started losing weight too, just a couple weeks ago and I can already see a difference! I won't give away his stats because he has a blog too that he will probably post later and I don't want to steal his thunder but he is doing FANTASTIC. He will blow you away with his progress! He is so driven and commited! He seems stronger in all this than I was! Especially when I first started. He is so inspiring, be on the lookout for his post soon! I'll put a link in my facebook when he posts his!

So other than that stuff, my legs have gotten some crazy definition going on! I have skinny ankles and big feet so it looks like I have frog legs but check it!:

Oh, and excuse the messy room!

Day 152

Well I hopped on the scale this morning and it said 133.6! So I lost like 3 or 4 punds this week which is more than I should be losing. So I'm upping my calories to 1600/day. But I  am now sub-previous goal!
I assume its from the 10k training... massive calorie burn.

Speaking of the training, its going very well! My trusty running buddy and cousin, Rebecca and I are up to running about 5 miles now (with our short walks every 2000 yards, as prescribed by our program). That doesnt include warm up/cool down distances. We are almost finished with week 2. Just need to run tomorrow. 10k is the equivalent of 6.2 miles, so we have a little ways to go before we're putting up that number. 4 more weeks to be exact. Then its on to speed training! Its way more fun to run with a friend than to run alone. To me anyway.

It has been easier to eat clean now with my husband on board doing the same thing as I am. No more junk food temptations in the house haha.
So I just wanted to give a little update. My stomach has noticeably gotten flatter. Here's my measurements:

Last time (12/13)           Today:

Arm: 10.5"                      Arm: 10"

Waist: 29.5"                   Waist: 29"

Hips: 34.5"                     Hips: 34.5"

Thigh: 22"                      Thigh: 21"

Calf: 14.25"                    Calf: 14"

So I have definitely lost inches everywhere but my hips! Fine by me! I feel so free! Its fun :)

So yeah that about wraps it up for today.

Here's some motivation:   :)

Update

I feel good starting the new year off like this. I just ran 5 days in a row! Still working off those holiday treats. I forgot to weigh in this morning before i chugged 24oz of water but when I did, I was 136.4. So I have definitely lost weight again.

My cousin Rebecca recently moved back home from North Carolina and we have been running a lot. She lived there for almost a year with her brother's family while he was deployed (he's a marine).
So she's back now and we are running buddies! We are training for a 10k race in May! (The Human Race.)

I finished my 5k improver app program this week and so we both started a 5 to 10k program yesterday! My calorie burn is already doubled and we aren't even running full 10k's yet!
So I'll be taking a break from working on my speed for 6 weeks of 10k training. Then we will start a 5days/week grueling 10k speed improvement program, hopefully finishing just before the race!
So yeah lots of cool exciting things on the horizon! I'm thinking of doing a few more diet bets to pay for it. Its only $35 but hey, if I can win my entry fee, that would be great :)

Other than that, everything has been pretty good. I've been staying on track with my eating. Been working in the garden a little. Doing some prep for spring. I get sprung fever too early every year. But I'm planning where everything will go, picking out seeds, turning soil etc.

Mission Accomplished :)

You guys, I did it!! I DID IT!

it took 124 days. Running over 314 miles. (That doesn't include the miles I have walked)

Counting almost every calorie. I have lost 37.6 pounds and finally hit my goal! OMG!

There it is my friends, 135 pounds, right on the money this morning! I did it!! 

as for measurements:

Last week:                Today:

Arms 10.5"                 10.5"

Waist 29.75"              29.5"

Hips 35.5"                  34.5"

Thighs 22"                 22"

Calves 14.25"            14.25"

In case anyone questions whether or not I did it healthily, I lost an average of 2.12 pounds per week... which is a little more than recommended, but I started at an obese weight and it came off really quickly in the beginning, before I even started blogging. I ate on average, 1400 calories a day. Exercised a minimum of 4 days a week. I used the C25K program (apps available) to get into running. I went from barely being able to jog for 60 seconds without being out of breath, to being able to run 5K (3.11 miles) in 27:11 (yep, new PR last Saturday!)

Believe me, I get all my vitamins and minerals, meet my macros, and I feel amazing. my nails are healthier and grow faster. my hair is long, full and shiny. I have lots of muscle (and am working on building more now!)

It also is worth mentioning that i have continued to successfully nurse Hailie throughout this whole weight loss journey. If I wasn't eating enough for my body needs, that wouldn't have worked.

I have more energy than I know what to do with. I have no problem getting on the floor and playing with my little 1 year old daughter for however long she wants. I'm not done yet. I can weigh as little as 108 pounds and still be considered "normal" and healthy. I'm probably not going to get down that low ever, but I'm thinking of shooting for the 100-and-teens. 

Here's a couple screenshots from my weight-tracking app today:

As you can see, the weight came off really fast at first, and then everything settled into a pretty steady pace. 

For now, I have a few more days of my diet bet games... I needed to be 137.3 in order to win, and I have surpassed that. So a few more days of maintaining or losing more and then I will enjoy some Christmas treats (in moderation!) enough to maintain my weight. After New Year's, I will start Operation Six-Pack! haha. I don't know what that would look like, seeing as I have stretch marks and loose stomach skin. But I will try to get as close as I can. Don't know what that weight would be, but there is still a good layer of blubber over my stomach. Won't be very hard. I'm going to try to lose at a slower rate though, It has been coming off faster than I want, for the past week. My goal now is to be, look, and feel FIT. not skinny, but fit. 

The above picture is me at the start... about 172 pounds. Obese. Unhappy. Lying to myself about my body. And the picture on the right is today. 135 and i feel 100% different.

I used to avoid ever getting on the scale. I would tell myself I wasn't really that fat. I made jokes about my stomach. I hated how I felt though. I had to get honest, buckle down and just do it. It was really hard sometimes. You guys have been reading this most of the time. I battled myself more than anything. There were nights when I REALLY wanted to stuff my face. My stomach can be a bottomless, black hole of a pit. This is not over. Reaching my goal is by no means a license to go back to the way things were. granted, I DO have to eat more calories in order to stop losing weight, but I will gain it all back if I stop eating healthy and clean. Those old habits are right there waiting for me to let my guard down. I will NEVER weigh that much again!! (unless I'm actually pregnant... then it is possible.)

Definitely won't get up to the previous highest pregnancy weight of 205 pounds. 

One thing I just have to write about... a couple times I have felt bad about writing all this thinking of readers who are bigger than my biggest... I have been afraid that they read it and criticize me for feeling too fat when I'm so much smaller than them. I have been afraid that they would say to me "yeah right, you don't know what its like to REALLY be fat." I know I may not have ever been SUPER fat, but medically I WAS OBESE. Not morbidly, but still. For me personally, it was too much. For me personally, I still have too much fat on my stomach. Everyone's journey is different. I want to be here for anyone and anyone looking for support or a way out. I lost just shy of 40 pounds. in almost 5 months. Maybe you weigh WAYYYY more than I ever did, and feel like its impossible. Don't buy in to the message that losing weight is impossible. I DID it! most of my readers actually KNOW ME. They have seen it all in person! I am surprised that I have really done it. I really am... because I used to believe it wasn't really possible. "I just can't seem to ever lose this weight!" I'd seen other people do it, and wish it was me. WISH NO MORE, PEOPLE. YOU CAN DO IT. I'm gonna pay it forward, and if anyone wants help, I will help!! Message me on facebook, or email me at dalahshawty@yahoo.com and I will do my best to help you. I can give you personalized calorie goals, workout schedules, meal plans, all the support you need, whatever it is. I'm serious, I feel so amazing, I long for everyone struggling with their weight to feel this way!! Now I see people at the store, or wherever and I see myself in their shoes. The old me. and I know how to help now! I know how to lose all that extra weight! Hopefully I don't sound cocky or conceited, like I'm "so smart" or "so cool" or something. I'm just really honestly SO excited about all of this. Please know, my heart is never to judge or anything... because I HAVE BEEN THERE. Not having anything to wear because I have grown out of all my clothes. Not caring anymore. I have been there. But I found the way out, and I can help you get out too! It takes a hell of a lot of commitment, but just about anyone can do it. 

I will write again with a weigh-in on Christmas Eve, because that was my goal date, and I want to see what I really weigh on that day. Thank you for following me on this journey, all the supportive comments have helped me more than you guys know. There were days I wanted to just give up, eat a ton of food, whatever and I thought of all my readers who are rooting for me, and who would have to know I failed. It helped to write about all of this so much. You guys have helped me reach this goal. my BMI is now 23.9 (Healthy) and I started at 30.5 (Obese). Talk to you all on Christmas EVE!!

Are we there yet?

I'm really beginning to notice how a positive attitude has a huuuge impact on my body. The weeks when I get all negative, stressed and down on myself, I lose almost nothing. And then the weeks where I keep my head up, focus, stay positive, upbeat and happy, I suddenly drop a ton of weight. Even if Daniel and I DID bake Chocolate Chip cookies last night and eat 2! (yes, I managed to only eat 2!!)

I know I'm getting closer and closer to my goal, any week now i will hit it! One of my apps is predicting I'll hit it by December 11th so let's see what we have today! *steps on scale*:
136.6!! Another 2 pounds lost! I'm pretty stoked!! Only 1.6 pounds away from goal! I could very well put up 135 next week. Who knows if i will, but it is a very real possibility now!
I'm only 4 pounds away from having lost 40. All through lots of exercise (mainly running) and clean, balanced eating. Never felt deprived. Never suffered.

Oh, and I know I didn't post my measurements last week. It was really cold and I was lazy. But here are this week's!

Today:                             Previously (11/22/13):
Arm: 10.5"                     Arm: 11"
Waist: 29.75"                 Waist: 30"
Hips: 35.5"                     Hips: 36"
Thighs: 22"                     Thighs: 22.5"
Calf: 14.25"                    Calf: 14.25"

Its really important that I see drops in those numbers when I see drops on the scale. Because then I know I am losing fat. Not just water or muscle weight. So I am happy with those numbers today :)

I am having to curb my running a little bit. I'm getting a good amount of pain in my right foot. Its like... above the arch, on the side of my foot. There's these bones and the one closer to my ankle has been killing me if i run on road that is slanted to the left. If i run on even ground, or ground slanted to the right, its all gravy. But otherwise, its bad. Especially if i go for more than 3.1 miles (5k). Here, I'll use the ole' Google to show you which bones:

Pretty sure its one of the joints on the "Tuberosity" bone. I think its the "Talocalcaneonavicular joint". That's exactly where the pain is. Really weird place, it seems like.

Any of my running readers know a cause/solution? I think it must be my form. If I make a conscious effort to keep that foot straight when running, it seems to help. I twisted or sprained (or whatever) that ankle several times in the past and I think it could have had something to do with that? Then again, this is a fairly new problem... not more than a month old so maybe its my new shoes? I got them the last week of October.
This really sucks though, many times I have to just go for a walk instead of running. I can't get faster if I can't train enough! And its not going to help my weight loss pace.

Anyways, besides the foot, everything has been going pretty good. I'll do a progress pic when I make goal weight. I continue to be inspired by a lot of fitness page posts on Instagram (follow me: heartsonfire707)
So here are a few from this week:

And what was your excuse again?

Now on to a new week!

What Its Really Like

I feel strange in this new body sometimes. I think I'm so unfamiliar with it. It is ever changing and deflating. Its hard sometimes (I know right... poor me... haha).

I feel the opposite of what it seems I should be feeling! I have these moments and days where I am proud and confident, but then other days where I'm kinda self conscious about how I look. I guess so much focusing on my body, trying to make it better, makes me notice everything I don't like and the imperfections.
There was a reason I was fat. There were bad habits and no doubt some psychological reasons behind it all that I need to think about, pray about and figure out.
I think now that the weight is coming off I feel vulnerable. I'm not hidden under a nice layer of fat.
I've said it before but it bears repeating that weight loss is almost all mental. The physical part is easy. Its the mental part you gotta work on. All your troubles and reasons aren't going to go away as the pounds melt. They'll be uncovered, more likely.
Sometimes I look in the mirror and I'm just like "Daaaaayum!" And other times I see my stomach sticking out still. Having stretch marks doesn't help. And my hips still seem too wide. I know I'm still a work in progress... its a comforting thought. But there will always be room for improvement and I need to start to love myself more so I can enjoy the new me! I just look in the mirror sometimes and my mind is used to seeing and criticizing the old me. The new skinnier me is, well... new. I'm not used to it yet. So I guess you could say its almost like I'm having a mild identity crisis haha.

Ok, now for weigh-in results! Last week I was 142.8 pounds... today I am 140.6! 2.2 pounds lost!! Once again, I am completely shocked.

I don't know how I'm losing so fast all of the sudden! Maybe lifting weights really is making a huge difference? I knew it would help, just didn't know it could be THIS MUCH! I have lost a total of 32 pounds now. My BMI today is 24.9... I am now officially not considered overweight! (By 0.1 points lol). Just by the skin of my teeth isn't good enough though, that's why 135 is my goal. I will undoubtedly be in the 130's by next week. I can wait to see those numbers on the scale!

Picture proof of today (not that you don't believe me... and I know, I need to fix my toenails haha. Kinda ratchet.)

Oh yes, measurements have to be done!

Start arm (11/1): 12"   Last week's arm: 11.5"      Today: 11"

Start waist: 31"           Last week's waist: 30.5"     Today: 30"

Start hips: 37.5"          Last week's hips: 36.5"      Today: 36"

Start thighs: 23"          Last week's thighs: 22.5"    Today: 22.5"

Start calves: 15"         Last week's calves: 14.5"   Today: 14"

So I lost inches everywhere but my thighs! (which is totally fine with me. I like my legs lately)

Something cool I noticed: This past week Hailie was playing in the closet and kept wanting to open and close her sock drawer (as most any 1-yr-old would!) But she wasn't so good at the opening part. Meanwhile across the bedroom, I was rubbing my husband Daniel's back while he watched Dirty Jobs on Netflix. Hailie kept calling me to open the drawer every minute or so, and without even realizing it, I kept getting up, running to help her, then running back to Daniel. This went on for several minutes. Then I noticed: it wasn't hard for me to get up! I was just doing it! Over and over without any trouble at all! It wasn't a pain in the butt!

I have a lot more energy now. That same night, I spent a good half hour pushing her around in her beloved Costco grocery box and making driving and crashing noises to make her laugh. And playing ball with her. And then making and cleaning up dinner, picking up all Hailie's messes... it is really cool! I feel almost like I did when I was 10 years old giving horsy rides to little brothers. It doesn't take the wind out of me to get down on the floor and play with my baby and THAT is priceless!

I have had a lot of people ask me what I'm doing and how I'm losing all this weight. I've talked about it in past blogs but not everyone has read them all so I'll try to explain it again in a nutshell:
Basically eating clean (well... most of the time!), keeping a food journal (Myfitnesspal app makes this a breeze!), counting all calories, running and finally, lifting weights.

I took a nutrition class at the jc 2 years ago and I have read several books on the subject so I had some knowledge already. The way the human body works is something I've always been interested in, and I have found it very easy to retain the information I learn. Nevertheless, the days leading up to the start of my weight loss journey, I literally Googled things like "how to lose weight." You can learn most of what you need to know by doing that. Google your resting metabolic rate. Multiply it by 1.4, if you are somewhat active. Then cut 500 calories from that number per day through diet and/or exercise and you should lose roughly a pound per week. Cut more, lose more. Most medical professionals agree that you shouldn't try to lose more than 2 lbs per week. More than that may be unhealthy unless you are in the class II level of obesity. It really is that simple though. Figure out your numbers, stick to it, adjust according to weekly results if needed and it will work. There's no magic pill. No special workout. I don't eat "low fat" stuff. I'm not on a "low carb" plan. I eat healthy, balanced meals, in proper portions. 

You have to put in the work and effort and time. "Calories in, calories out." As my Nonnie used to say. (My Mom's mom... she knows what she's talking about.)

This is a screenshot of another app I've been using called "Monitor Your Weight"

It is SUPER useful in that it will keep track of all your weigh-ins, and as shown, it will graph it all for you and give you a projected date of goal completion! which, as you can see, I am 2 weeks ahead of schedule! Its predicting that I'll reach goal weight by December 10th!

The green dotted line is your goal. The brown one is how you are doing right now. If it falls below the green line, you are ahead of schedule. If it falls above... you are behind schedule.

This is a screenshot from the same app, but its the "Current Details" tab. Basically like the home page:

I don't follow the "diet" line... I have my own plan. Which by the way, it changed again today. The more weight you lose, the less calories you need... so you need to consume a fewer amount of calories in order to lose weight at the same rate. So MyFitnessPal app is now saying I should consume 1220 a day. :( 

I will probably still eat pretty close to 1300 haha since I have been losing so rapidly at that number.

I'm so glad I started this, when I did. In 4 days, this Tuesday, will be my 100th day into my weightloss journey. 100 days of counting almost every single calorie. Even "cheat" ones. 100 days. I am down over 30 pounds in less than 100 days. Wow. I am soooooo glad that I started when I did. I can't imagine if I HADN'T started! I would feel so devastated if I was still at my starting weight (or heavier!!) today! I didn't wait for "this Monday", "New Year's Day" or "next week" I started in the moment. I couldn't take it anymore. The fat had to stop! No more wishing and longing! I chose to just get up and do it! And I'm so glad that I did, when I did! 

Metamorphosis in progress

Well I am less than thrilled with today's weigh in, but I'm not surprised. I had several cheat days last weekend and was over my calorie goal most days this week. I don't know why but it has been hard to stay on track this week. That old overeating monster is rearing its big ugly face again.
Last week's weight: 147.8
Today's: 147.0

Lost .8 pounds... not the kind of numbers I need to see in order to hit my goal. It really sucks. But I'm lucky I lost weight at all! I gotta keep my head up and look how far I've come! 25 pounds lost in 76 days! So with that, time to dust myself off, learn from my mistakes and press on. I have a big party to go to soon and I vow to stay on goal today.

Thoughts of the week:

Its all about thrift stores for me right now! I'm on my way, and some of my smaller clothes are too big now. I got like 8 new tshirts and a couple new pairs of shorts at the gooodwill store, all for like 30 bucks. That's wassup!! No way am I gonna pay for new clothes that I will probably only be able to wear for a month. I'm gonna ask for giftcards this christmas and for my birthday so that when I DO get down to my goal weight, I will treat myself to some new tiny clothes!
I will be packing up my "fat clothes" soon and storing them for next time I'm pregnant.

My bones are a lot more prominent lately. Which makes sense, but it never occured to me that that would happen. I feel bad for Hailie, she layes her head on my shoulders and I can feel my bones digging into her face! My wrists and hands are more bony, feet, knees... and I can see a lot more definition in my legs lately. Its like "Whoa, I have some muscles under there!!"
Pretty cool.

This past week I have really been doing better at strength training. I'm behind schedule for beating my sister Bella at pushups, but slow progress is still progress! I can do 3 now :D

I've started lifting weights a few times a week. I loooove feeling sore! Then I know I did a good job working out! I really wanna bulk up my upper body. I have wimpy arms. I really do. I would love some defined, "tank top" arms, so I'm going for it and getting them. Still doing lots of squats. I can do 70 now. After my challenges are over, I'm gonna focus on more weight and less reps in order to bulk up a little.

Something I wondered would happen to me is the dreaded "loose skin" that you can have after a big weight loss. I was afraid of it happening to me. The only loose skin I have is on my stomach. But the more fat I lose, the less everything sags. It really isn't very bad at all. I have stretch marks. They have faded a lot. I know I will never have a stunning, gorgeous set of 6-pack abs. I might have a 6-pack, but it will probably have loose wrinkly skin and stretch marks. But you know what? That's ok. Who cares?? They are my battle scars of pregnancy haha. Hailie is worth it all. And I would have had the stretch marks AND a big belly still if I continued to let my fear of saggy skin deter me from losing weight.

It was just another excuse. One of the many. I realized... I didn't really want to lose weight. If I really had wanted to, I would. When you really want something, you make it happen. I decided I wanted to lose weight. Where there's a will, there's a way. I figured out how much I wanted and needed to lose, figured out how much time was a reasonable amount in order to accomplish said weight loss, and commited to that goal. Weight loss takes real true commitment. When you fall down, you get back up. You stick to it like glue. Even when it sucks. And it really will. It takes real, true, hardcore commitment. And with that comes will power.

Time for a progress pic!

9/27/13, 152.4 lbs:

10/25/13, 147.0 (5.4 pounds less):

Aaaand here's a bunch Of what I

inspired me this week:

And I just though this was cute :)  

A little bit about what I'm doing exactly

"In one year, what would you wish you had started, today?" "Tomorrow you will wish you would have started today." "We live our whole life in the present. We only have right now, so now is the time to start. No more procrastinating what I want for my life." -those are some of the realizations I had to come to, to start changing. I was finally ready. Before, I wanted lots of food. More than I needed. Now I want health and a fit body. This is my 3rd blog post now, I didn't realize I had so much to talk about but here we are!

Last week I out uo 152.4 on the scale. This morning I am at 150.8!!!!! Over a pound and a half lost!! Needless to say i am ecstatic!! That whole "no cheat days/meals" paid off! 

These are the kinds of numbers I need to put up in order to meet my goal. I completely expect to be in the 140's by next week and today is also another milestone... I'm officially smaller than Daniel has ever seen me! Soooo cool :)

I have found my exercise/sport that works for me. And its running. As of this week, my current 5k time is 32:12. My goal is to run it in under 30 minutes by November 2nd, which is the day of the Run Or Die 5k race at the Sonoma County Fairgrounds. I haven't signed up for it yet -don't really have an extra $45 lying around (and I need new running shoes... anyone wanna sponsor me?? Haha) but even if I can't run in the race I decided I will still train to beat that 30 minute mark by that day. Currently I'm doing a speed training program. You train a min. of 4 days/week. Day one you sprint 300 meters, then walk 100 over and over for 5k. Then day 2, you just run a full 5k. Repeat day one, then repeat day 2. The next week (my current week) you sprint for 400, walk 100, next day run the full 5k and next, the sprinting again.
The sprinting intervals get longer and longer and you can go faster and faster at your 5k. So those are my current workouts but I reaaaaally need to start lifting weights. I need to work on my upper body and core strength. Gotta get me some of them 6 pack abs all the young'ins are sporting ;) (hey, I can dream!)
But really though. It would be raaaad to have a 6 pack!
I told my sister Bella that by Halloween I will beat her at pushups (currently she can do 15... and I can do... 1! Haha... told you i need to work on upper body strength.) My legs are getting shredded and I want the rest of me to match! Plus if I put on more muscle, the fat will melt away even faster... which I need if I wanna meet my Christmas Eve Goal of 135 lbs! So to kick off all of that I'm gonna do these challenges: 

I added pushups to the second one. I'll start off doing one and then +1 everyday except the rest days and by halloween i should be able to do at least 27 :)

I have been super good this week. No cheat days at all, eating super healthy, exercising as much as I should be. And last week I was under my weekly calorie goal by like 250! (From exercise, not starving myself.)

A typical day for me food-wise, is usually (plain! Not that flavored kind in packets!) oatmeal for breakfast with a splash (1/4 cup) of milk and sprinkled with cinnamon. Or a bowl of cold cereal like cheerios or total if i want a semi-junk food treat.

Few hrs later I'll have a huge green salad (typically a whole head of romaine lettuce, 4 cherry tomatoes, one serving of feta cheese, some almonds or walnuts, a few croutons -i looove croutons- and topped with some light poppyseed dressing I picked up at BigLots which only has 40 cals per serving but I always double it cause I eat a lot of lettuce and it is the bomb.com).
So that keeps me full for awhile!  Sometimes I chop some bell pepper in place of tomato. Sometimes i use both (depending on what I have) and sometimes I crumble a couple slices of bacon on it. That's right, I eat bacon. WHEN my calorie allotment allows for it and it is in moderation! I don't go bacon crazy! (I have cooked and eaten a whole pound of it before). Other days I might just have a tuna sandwich on homemade bread. Or chicken breast/mayo/cheese/mustard sandwich. The list goes on and I don't eat seconds because I'm trying to lose weight and honestly, i just don't need seconds.
My MyFitnessPal app calculates all my macronutrients and yes, I am able to get 100% of my daily recommended amounts of my essential vitamins and minerals on just 1300 calories because for the most part, I chose nutrient-dense foods.

So anyways, then I usually need a snack before dinner. Apple slices with peanut butter are a fave. Today I ate fishy crackers, even though they aren't healthy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no need for me to get discouraged. I only had a couple handfulls (really tho) and so I still stayed under my calorie limit. It is almost always fruit though, for my snack.

Dinner is usually a meat and a biiiig pile of a cooked veggies. Either 2 boneless skineless chicken breasts (you can get a huge bag of those frozen babies at Costco for like $25 bucks. Hella worth it.) Or it'll be a pork chop or one 4oz steak or turkey burger etc. And the veggie is typically squash from our garden or broccoli, spinach or green beans cause those are all my favorite. Sometimes I do steamed or sauteed bok choy or swiss chard. With a little salt OMG #nom!

Aaaand that's it. In bed by 9 usually, full night's sleep and repeat the next day with whatever variation fits into my 1300 calorie days. Last night I had a no-sugar-added banana berry smoothie cause I ran and I deserved it! But I don't usually eat back my workout calories. 

My 1300 allotment is -500 calories from what my body burns per day if I do no exercise. If I were to go for an extra long run and burn an additional 500 I might eat a couple hundred back but that's cause you don't want to have a deficit of over 1000 because it may slow your metabolism. So usually my calories are cut and I workout on top of it. My runs usually burn 400 calories +/-. Oh and unless my run ends right before a mealtime, I have a whey protein shake (chocolateeeeee!) Immediately afterwards. If you don't have a smartphone or don't want to/can't use MyFitnessPal to figure out how many calories to eat, you can go here: http://www.bmi-calculator.net/bmr-calculator/ For a good BMR calculator.

I feel amazing physically. I have lost 22 lbs and it makes a difference. I now get up in the morning and my feet don't hurt from the weight! I have a lot more energy! I just have this happy feeling!
I used to not like to turn my head down cause then I would feel how big my double chin was getting. Now I do it on purpose to see if its gotten smaller. (Yeah, I'm weird).

Emotionally, I feel amazing too. I feel happy. That's the best way to describe it. I'm just tickled with my accomplishments I guess. Not in a cocky or conceited way at all, but I'm proud of what I'm doing and for the first time in years I'm getting back some confidence and self-esteem this whole weight loss thing is working for me, nothing is gonna stop me now! I am changing forever!

"Potential is worthless if it is never being developed and used"

Don't let your excuses and obstacles stop you! Challenge yourself!

Oh and I really want this shirt:

This one REALLY hit home for me:

YES.

And Its even easier for boys!:

Giiiirl, you know dats whassup!